Do you think most learners actively read and engage with thetext in your eLearning courses? Or do they skim through walls of text just toclick through the slides and get to the “good” parts (animations, videos,etc.)?
Words are a pillar of good design. To grab learners at “Hello,”we must start designing our words. Like many writers, I find certain aspects ofwriting and proofreading are excruciating. Deadlines and client constraintscause me to take shortcuts. Careful revision is sometimes the easy sacrifice.But I found an answer, and in this article I offer it to you. You can put it towork today, using a tool you already own.
Writing and feng shui
In our field, things change fast. More often than not, wejuggle multiple aspects of our projects. Content writing can become little morethan a “copy and paste” job, based on what subject-matter experts provide.After all, writing and proofreading are not always quite as much fun ascreating a visually attractive slide, a great interaction, a video, or even agame.
To leave our learners with something of substance, we needto pay more attention to our text, whether that’s text on a slide, instructionsfor a learning interaction, or something else. If we want learners to actually read what we write, we must write,read, and revise. Editing does not have to be drudgery.
“Feng shui” is an ancient practice based on selecting theoptimal arrangement to encourage positive energy flow. Interior designers haveused this phrase to describe perfect placements of objects and surfaces. Fengshui, though often thought of as a philosophy that can be applied to architecture and interior design, has a message for writers as well. Instructionaldesigners can borrow ideas from feng shui for writing to encourage informationflow and keep the learner reading.
Look at your content with an attitude of feng shui. Removeword clutter. Refocus your writing. Where to begin? I want to reintroduce youto your word processing software.
Declutter with find and replace
Many of us, myself included, fall in love with what wewrite, and love is blind. Lucky for us, MS Word, and every other wordprocessor, has a “find and replace” function. Use “find and replace” to cutthrough your mind’s ability to ignore writing weak spots. Bruce Ross-Larson, inhis book Edit Yourself (see “Reference”at the end of this article), helps contentwriters find the words and phrases scattered across your work that derail yourlearner’s engagement. With the help of Larson and other writing mentors we canclean up the clutter.
Five red flags to find and revise
Search your writing and find these five red flags to cleanup the clutter.
- Titlesand headings
First look at your titles. Titles are the front door to your content.Well-formatted headlines are inviting while all capitals yell at your guests.As instructional designers we serve the client. Sometimes clients have text-formattingpreferences that may not follow grammar standards. Start with a unified styleguide combining the client’s wishes with good grammar.
Try this: Headlines or titles have three formats, according to the neweststyle-guide for digital media, The Yahoo!Style Guide. The editors suggest you choose between sentence case (written like a sentence), all upper case, or title case(capitalize all the words except tiny words: “a,” “an,” “and,” “at,” “but,”“by,” “for,” “in,” “nor,” “of,” “on,” “or,” “so,” “the,” “to,” “up,” and “yet).To create clutter-free writing, use titlecase. Write a title or headline that draws your learner into the contentand be consistent across the slides with your title format.
- It
Itcan be a problem. While many explanations tell us why it can make writing look primitive, focus on ambiguity. If it does not refer to a specific subjectand only to a thought in the writer’s head, we leave too many words with toolittle meaning. Starting a sentence with “It is . . .” is a warning sign forword clutter.
Try this: Find every instance of it in your text using your wordprocessor’s Search and Replace function. Look at each time you used it in a sentence. Ask: Where is thesubject of it? Where is the locationof it? What does it mean? Can we cut or reword it?
- There is
Thereis can be as problematic the word “it.” Expletives, “it is,” “there is,” and“there are,” add unnecessary words and weaken the message. Readers prefersimple subject and verb construction—in that order.
Try this: Search for “There is” or “There are” in your text. See if you canreword by putting the real subject first. According to The Grammar Girl, aka MignonFogarty, “The trick to figuring out what verb to use is to find the realsubject of the sentence.”
- The___of/ Of___the
Nominalizationsand unnecessary infinitive phrases like the___of and of___the cancreate word confusion. You want your readers to flow through your eLearningcontent and learn. Look at your writing and see if you have a sentence likethis: In the field of retailsales an associate must learn customer service. Revise, eliminating the/of: A retail sales associate mustlearn customer service.
Try this: Search your content for the word,“of.” Find how “of” is used and see if you can revise or remove unnecessarywords.
- To andmore . . .
Stop writing in circles and be direct. Circumlocutionis using many words when a few would do. Instead of: Your manager has the ability tomake your work productive. Write: Yourmanager can make your work productive.
Try this: Look for words or phrases like “to,” “it is,” “that is,” “that are,” “inaccordance with,” “on the occasion of,” “at this/at that,” “is ___ to,” “upthe,” “out the,” and “who are.” Find and revise redundant phrases into succinctsentences. Never use extra words without adding extra meaning.
Scattered words and phrases hide your word design; it may betime for a writing makeover. Rewriting eLearning content starts by using yourword processing tools to spot wordiness. With practice, concise writing willbecome your natural style. For help rearranging your words and phrases, consultPurdue OWL, Grammar Girl, and EditYourself (see “Reference” below).
Brian Carroll, in Writingfor Digital Media (see “Reference”), says, “Hemingway described prose notas interior decoration but as architecture.” Feng shui is not so much interiordecorating as it is architecture. Architects who use feng shui do so with the intent of building toward positive progressive energy. In the same way, well-constructed content ebbs and flows, providing learners with asatisfying finish.
Reference
Barr, C. (ed.) The Yahoo! Style Guide: Writing for anOnline Audience. New York, NY:St. Martin’s Griffin, 2011.
Carroll, B. Writing for DigitalMedia. New York, NY: Routledge, 2010.
Grammar Girl: Oddness When You Start a Sentence with “There Is”:Quick and Dirty Tips. 3 June 2011.
https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/oddness-when-you-start-a-sentence-with-there-is
Purdue OWL: Conciseness. Undated.
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/572/04/
Ross-Larson, Bruce. Edit Yourself:A Manual for Everyone Who Works with Words.
New York: Norton, 1996.
Shaughnessy, M. P. Errors and Expectations:A Guide for the Teacher of Basic Writing.
New York: Oxford University Press, 1977.
